Saturday, June 2, 2012

Elections, difficult children and sex

So the disciplinary method for Sothy was an utter failure, he found it to be far too entertaining trying to remove the strappings from his wrists and was very successful, the punishment was a game to Sothy. His behavior has improved a little, I'm not really sure why, it may be due to a little increased attention, I've been doing my best to improve my patience and be more affectionate with him. We took Vichet, an older boy who is brilliant with Sothy, swimming last week and he was a great help. Hopefully Sothy was just going through a rare bad patch before. We have had no more success either with organizations that could help Sothy. He needs one on one care which is too costly. We have a couple of other organization/people to contact but we're not very hopeful, we are beginning to consider sending him to Thailand. We didn't seriously consider sending him to Europe but we have been told that the only European country that will allow those carrying the HIV virus in is Greece!
Another 'child' I have had difficulty with is 18 year old Sok lin. We had a very bad lesson where she was being incredibly grumpy and I was having to be the strong teacher. It was horrible she doesn't see us as equals, but I am very aware of our small age difference so it make disciplining her hard. She was being very unresponsive in the lesson and refusing to help others that were having difficulties. I made her move to the front which she did very reluctantly and we had quite a struggle over, she was arsy for the rest of the lesson and I caught her mocking me which wasn't very nice. I spoke to her after the lesson after another struggle and she had an excuse of course so I did the you should talk to someone about your problems speel, I was so nervous about that chat. She was much better the next lesson though so hopefully it will be alright now. The whole thing made me feel bad for giving my teachers a hard time, I never really considered that they had feelings, they do! mocking hurts!
I've also realized that I couldn't ever be a full time English teacher as I don't understand the English language myself.

In the last two weeks Beth and I have done PSHE sessions on puberty and sex ed. We felt very brave tackling such taboo topics, I kept finding myself coloring up. Bethany had an interesting chat with Key about sex in Cambodia during which she found out; it is ok for men to sleep around but definitely not for women, women should be virgins on their wedding night and if they don't bleed the husband can easily justify divorcing her the next morning, Engagements are very short on average lasting between 2 weeks and a month, Women are expected to have sex whenever their husband demands it, it is not a problem that families all share the same bed children are simply sent out to play, it is not uncommon for women to have surgery on their vaginas to try and prevent their husbands accusing them of sleeping around before the marriage. Girls and boys can't walk alone without being thought badly of, families like to have a lot of control  over dates and romances.

We have taken the children on a couple of walks to the riverside this week, the riverside seems to be where the khmer socialise. The streets are lined with little food stalls and a couple of sets of big speakers are set up on the pavement which people dance in front of. It was really nice taking the children, its strange seeing the children outside of the orphanage they behave quite differently and its lovely being their source of security, it made me realize quite how much I have grown to love them.

It's election weekend at the moment and although there is little doubt over who will win, campaigners are out in force. This article though sad is really interesting. http://www.nytimes.com/2012/06/01/opinion/10000-days-of-hun-sen.html?_r=3&smid=fb-share. Campaigning here is quite different to back home, it seems that we campaign using information where as in Cambodia they campaign with a party atmosphere. For the last couple of days trucks of people covered in flags and banners have been driving up and down the streets blasting music and persuasive messages into every corner of Phnom Penh. On Friday there was huge gatherings of people trucks, food stalls and speakers in Phnom Penh, there was an amazing atmosphere. It feels quite brain washy but it seems a lot of people fall for it. The campaigning is pretty much solely in support of the Cambodian people's party and I am very aware of how corrupt it all is but it is really hard not to be affected by the hype, the tactics work! I left feeling jubilant. A couple of examples of corruption that I have heard is, people being offered bags of rice in return for votes, and my language teachers whole family were deprived of votes last election as they turned up to find someone had voted for them!


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